Interludium
armed and dangerous and sporting a non-too natural perm
christmas fic 
25th-Dec-2002 05:01 pm
Real men wear pink-rimmed glasses
I have 30 minutes to post this and then get ready before we leave for the relatives. I wanted to post this before leaving, just so I wouldn't have it hanging over my head the whole night since I do have another fic I want finished before the new year. This can be considered my *gasp!* Christmas fic of the year. I have never written a christmas fic, save for the yrpg parody a few years back.

Written in less than a day, and for anyone who knows how extremely slow I write, this is an achievement. Of course this fic was also my shameless excuse to write SasuNaru sap. Completely unbetad, I don't even have the time to give a quick read through because my parents will kill me if I'm not ready on time.

So well, enjoy? ^^

[Edit: Dec. 26] Finally had the time to read through the fic and change a few minor details and grammar mistakes. Also, I realize that Sasuke actually calls Naruto usurakontachi (it's almost like a pet name, aren't they sweet?), but it didn't really fit, so I used dobe instead.



Once Upon a Midnight Clear


It was cold.

It was so cold that cold wasn't even the right word to describe it. No. It wasn't cold. It was hell frozen over with devils in fur coats prancing about waving gigantic ice sticks in the air. It was so cold his fingers and toes would fall off from frostbite before he could even complain about getting frostbite. It was so cold in fact, that he was sounding like an insufferable prat because of it, even to himself.

Naruto let out an irritated sigh, uncertain if he was more irritated at himself (for being out so late in what must be the coldest night of the month) or at the cold (for well, for being cold). His next step sent his foot an inch deep in snow and although that wasn't really deep, it was enough to permit the chill into his already frozen foot. "The cold, definitely the goddamned cold," he decided darkly.

He made a mental note to take some sadistic satisfaction in getting back at the person, through whatever means possible, who assigned them a mission in Cloud country in the middle of December. December in the Leaf country was never this cold. They didn't even have snow back in Leaf. Home was all sunshine and rain and cold nights kept warm without having to wear ten layers of clothing that risked toppling over by just standing still.

It was with some sort of relief that he stumbled into the porch of the house they were staying at. He cast a quick glance across the porch, grateful for the roof over his head that kept the snow from underfoot. He'd feel a whole lot better once he got inside and out of these dreadfully wet and cold clothes. He spared a few moments to wonder at the existence of a front porch on the houses as he paused to scrape off the snow from his shoes. Houses in Leaf hardly had need, or the space to spare, to include something as uselessly luxurious as a front porch. It did great wonders as a place to scrape off snow from ones shoes though he decided as the last stubborn patch of ice fell off.

He fumbled around for the key as he trudged along the few feet to the front door and immediately froze in horror a moment later. Another frantic but thorough search of his pockets came up with the same results. His key was gone and was nowhere to be found. Either somehow lost in the dredge that was mud and ice on the streets or forgotten in his room as he'd left in a hurry earlier that day.

He took a deep, calming breath, determined that he was going to handle this in the same way any other person would in such a situation. "Oi!" Violent banging on the door, "Get your lazy asses off your beds and open the door!"

10 seconds.

"If nobody opens this goddamned door I'm going to put the entire house on fire!"

20 seconds.

"Are you guys dead!?"

25 seconds.

"I am Uzumaki Naruto and I demand that you open this door right this instant!"

35 seconds.

"I am going to whoop all your useless, cold asses once I get in there!"

45 seconds.

"AARRGGGH!!!"

50 seconds.

"Oi Sakura! I'm going to tell Ino you have a mustache and that you need to shave every two days!"

60 seconds.

"Sasuke you jerk! I know you can hear me! Open this door or I'm going to tell Ino you fancy her!"

75 seconds.

"Ino is going to kill me if she ever hears this," he grumbled.

95 seconds.

"Fine!" A violent kick to the door, "Stay all cozy and warm under your blankets while I freeze to death out here, you bastards."

Growling he turned his back to the door and made himself as comfortable as possible on the hard floor. At least all the shouting and banging had warmed him up a little, not that it was going to do him any good if he was going to stay out here until morning. He decided, with a bit of desolation, that dying of frostbite (especially right outside the front door due to a lost house key and teammates who slept like the dead) was a very stupid and inglorious way for a shinobi to die.

Idly, he thought back to years passed and the dangers he'd had to face even as a genin. He frowned, wondering if that thought had just sounded like a clichéd line from an adventure novel, not that he'd read any to judge it by of course. Hmph. Better an adventure novel than the Icha Icha Paradise that pervert sennin, Jiraiya wrote, inspired he was sure, by all the peeping he'd done in the women's bath throughout his pervert sennin years.

Anyway, he determined, compared to everything else he'd had to face in the past few years, he had just undoubtedly discovered the stupidest way to die.

He could already hear Sasuke at his funeral, "That idiot had it coming, wandering about in the middle of the night during winter." He stomped his foot against the floorboards, more out of the cold than in irritation. If Sasuke even dared to call him an idiot (that jerk) at his funeral he'd make sure to haunt him for the rest of his miserable existence.

Not that he was actually planning to die out here in the cold, but anything was better than just waiting for his butt to grow numb. He shifted, just to make sure that it hadn't actually grown numb in the few minutes he'd spent contemplating how to make Sasuke's life miserable.

He sighed. This was going to be a long night. He was bored already.

He was also cold.

And miserable.

And cold.

"Oi dobe. What are you doing blocking the door?"

Speak of the devil. Naruto squinted up at Sasuke, except he faintly remembered deciding earlier that devils wore fur coats and pranced around with pitchforks carved out from blocks of ice. "Where's your pitchfork?" He muttered darkly.

Sasuke frowned, "What?"

Nevermind. His mind registered belatedly that Sasuke had come from outside and was dusting the snow from his coat as they spoke. "Where have you been?"

"Me?" He turned to him, eyes narrowed. "Where have you been? You were supposed to be back hours ago."

Stubborn, "I asked first."

A grunt and Sasuke pushed him away from the door, "Looking for you."

"Huh?"

Sasuke looked down at the graceless heap on the floor, choosing to ignore the question with one of his own. "What were you doing waiting out here?"

Naruto felt his face heat up and he momentarily thanked the darkness for hiding it. "I lost my key and you all sleep like the dead," he grumbled.

Brows arched, "Hm?"

"Well alright, they sleep like the dead," he corrected grudgingly. "I didn't know you went out."

There was rare bemusement in Sasuke's tone, "What? Were you shouting obscenities at me again?"

Hotly, "You're damned right I was! And you deserved every single one of them too."

"As do you, for making me wander about in this weather looking for you," Sasuke retorted, disappearing inside the house.

Naruto stayed dumbfounded on the floor for a few moments, the fact that Sasuke had been out looking for him finally sinking in. He groaned. He was never going to live this down. How utterly humiliating. He scrambled to his feet, slamming the door behind him as he glared over at Sasuke who was busy feeding more wood into the fire.

"You did that on purpose," he accused.

Sasuke looked up, "Did what on purpose? Left you out there in the cold?" Dryly, "I didn't think you needed me to haul your frozen butt in here."

He very consciously resisted the urge to stomp his foot at this, "You very well know what I meant."

Sasuke only stared back at him and Naruto could have sworn that was the beginnings of a laugh that was twitching the corners of his mouth. "I've no idea what you mean, you moron. Now stop being so paranoid," he finally said, turning back to tend to the fire, poker in hand.

Naruto let out a disgruntled growl as he stalked over to sit beside Sasuke. He breathed a sigh of relief as warmth from the fire licked away the chill from his skin and his eyes closed, a low rumble dangerously resembling a purr vibrating softly from his throat. Oh this was better, much, much better. He could even ignore Sasuke completely for this. He took back everything he said about making Sasuke's life miserable. This was—

"Aaaah!" Eyes flew open as a sharp tug on his hair sent him sprawling backwards.

"You're supposed to get warm, you moron, not burn yourself," Sasuke told him sharply.

Years ago, this would have immediately started an argument between them, but six years had helped curb Naruto's temper and what often passed as bickering to other people was really nothing more than harmless banter between friends.

"You didn't have to pull on my hair," Naruto complained rubbing at his stinging scalp. "You have all the gentleness of a drunk hyena."

"I'm a ninja, not a mother."

Naruto grinned and slid his gaze over to his teammate, blue eyes glinted a strange shade of red from the fire, "Really? You sure could have fooled me." He cleared his throat, and then in a tone lower than his own and an almost dead on imitation of Sasuke's, "Where have you been, Naruto? You're supposed to get warm, not burn yourself, Naruto. I was out all night looking for you, Naruto. I've been worried sick, Naruto. I... " he trailed off at the expression on Sasuke's face. "Well... alright, so maybe it wasn't exactly like that, but you can't deny it, mother hen with the training of drunk hyenas, Sasuke."

If Naruto was expecting some kind of retort, which of course was exactly what he intended, he was sourly disappointed. Instead, Sasuke stared. Well glared even, Naruto wasn't entirely sure, since Sasuke's stares could always be mistaken for a glare even on his happier days.

Well then. Sasuke glared. Sasuke always glared and frankly, Naruto was getting quite sick and tired of it. He was just about to point this out when Sasuke cut his oncoming tirade short by reaching out a hand – and proceeded to roughly yank off his coat.

Naruto stared.

No, he gaped, and then blinked and froze for the better part of a few seconds (enough for Sasuke to get his entire coat unbuttoned) before finally letting out a strangled protest and shoving Sasuke away just as he'd started on his shirt.

"The fuck do you think you're doing?!" Naruto demanded, face flushing a bright red as he glared at Sasuke.

Sasuke's gaze flickered momentarily down to Naruto's half opened shirt before moving back up to meet his gaze, "You're going to get sick if you stay in those wet clothes," he deadpanned. "Take them off if you don't want to get a fever." Amusement, "And stop acting like a blushing virgin."

At those words, Naruto flushed even more, horrified to be caught thinking that Sasuke was, well… ungh! He yanked his coat and his shirt off, throwing them almost violently at Sasuke as he did so. "You bastard! You did that on purpose."

Sasuke ignored him as he stood up and left the room without a word. Naruto glowered, completely mortified even as he grudgingly admitted that he felt better without the damp clothes clinging to his skin. Something large and warm and soft fell on his head a moment later. He muttered a mild expletive as he grabbed it, a clean pair of pants, and then glared up at the offender.

"Take off your pants as well, virgin boy," Sasuke smirked. "I'll turn around if you want me to."

Naruto glared, ignoring the small voice at the back of his head that said in an almost sing-song pattern that he was glaring as much as Sasuke. Except Sasuke wasn't glaring at the moment and was instead looking infuriatingly amused.

"Shut the hell up," Naruto grumbled, shucking off his pants and sliding on the new pair. "If I'd know you'd get off on seeing me naked, I'd have done a strip show."

Sasuke only grunted a response as he returned to his place by the fire. They sat in silence for awhile, in the course of which Naruto had taken the poker from Sasuke and was using it to stir absentmindedly at the ashes on the fireplace.

"Neh... Sasuke," Naruto broke the silence finally, looking up to glance at him briefly before returning to the fire. "Have you ever thought of, well, how it would have been like? If you hadn't learned to control the curse and if-" he broke off, but the rest was clear as his free hand hovered momentarily over the seal on his navel before clenching and falling to his side.

He didn't see the surprise in Sasuke's face as he looked at Naruto, something flickering beneath the usual mask before he too turned his gaze back to the fire. "Kakashi once said that it was useless to dwell on a past that never happened."

Naruto looked up, startled, "You talked to him?"

An almost wry smile, "I can have a conversation, you know."

Naruto looked taken aback and then smiled, making a face at him as he did so, "You know what I mean."

"Yeah," softly, meaning something else entirely. "I do."

"It's just that-" Naruto started.

"Did you know," Sasuke cut in sharply, "the greatest difference between the curse seal and the kyubi inside you?"

"You mean other than the fact that the kyubi is one of the demon monsters of old with a personality to match?" Naruto joked.

Sasuke snorted and reached a hand out, warm fingers hot against Naruto's skin as he splayed them out, touching the edges of the seal as he rested his palm flat against it.

Eyes widened slightly, but Naruto remained silent, staring curiously at his companion.

"Orochimaru's curse depended solely on my hate and my anger and the bitterness of revenge," Sasuke explained quietly, eyes intent as they gazed into Naruto's own. "The Nine-tails became yours in order to save our village. Even now, you have never called upon its powers except to protect another."

He stood to leave and Naruto tried not to miss the pressure of his hand against his skin. "You have always been a hero, Uzumaki Naruto. Just like your father, even if others don't acknowledge you as one. Even if you yourself do not believe it."

Belatedly, before Sasuke disappeared into the next room. "Oi, Sasuke."

Sasuke turned, gaze questioning.

A smile, "Good night."

He looked momentarily startled and then a smirk bordering on a smile, "Make sure you turn out the fire before you sleep."

Naruto blinked, and then made a face at his retreating back before turning to throw in another piece of wood into the fire.

The night was still cold, but it no longer mattered.
Comments 
25th-Dec-2002 03:25 am (UTC)
cugami
*wonders where the sap went* ok. it's almost sap. XD
25th-Dec-2002 05:22 am (UTC)
shiny fluffy! ^_^

I can't say anything about characterization especially on sasuke's part since I haven't finished the scanlations yet. IC!Naruto though as far as I can see.

I want the other one.
26th-Dec-2002 05:19 am (UTC)
Other one is much harder to write, even though it threatens to be much shorter than this fic. *makes a face*
25th-Dec-2002 09:27 am (UTC) - *screams like the fangirl I am*
Anonymous
Ne, ne... Arcina... Write another one? Please? Please? This was Perfect in every sense of the word! The characterization were dead on and the plot was amazing and your writing is amazing and there just too few SasuNaru fics in English this good out there!!! You have to write more!! Please, please please!!! *begs you for ever and ever!* Happy X-MAS (*giggles* Inside joke with my brother)!! Ja! *waves waves*
26th-Dec-2002 05:05 am (UTC) - Re: *screams like the fangirl I am*
Thank you! ^_^

I actually do have another SasuNaru fic in the works, which I was originally working on before I took time out to write this little piece of rushed fluff. Would love to know who this is though, so I can thank you properly. ^^ Comments much appreciated, happy holidays! XD
3rd-Jan-2003 01:43 pm (UTC) - Oooh Achan has a fangirl!
That's just so cute!!! :D
25th-Dec-2002 11:42 am (UTC)
The non-too-sappy sap still-IC naruto fic, mithas style. At lassssst. Although your fic made me laugh lol, hell, these 2 always make me laugh. I eagerly look forward to your GS one. That one rocks {waves your objections away}.
26th-Dec-2002 05:24 am (UTC)
Always know the right things to say to flatter me, don't you? ;P The fic was supposed to be funny. Well light and humourous anyway, which is why I probably had a much easier time writing it. Thanks. ^^ And of course you and caillen are nagging me for the fic that's giving me the hardest time to write.

What does GS stand for? o_O
25th-Dec-2002 02:02 pm (UTC)
I don't think this is sappy o_O (LOL!) I love a lot of Sasuke's lines. Especially:

"Take off your pants as well, virgin boy," Sasuke smirked. "I'll turn around if you want me to."

^___^ Great fic!
26th-Dec-2002 05:54 am (UTC)
*glomp* Thank you. And well, I know it's not sappy, but it was my attempt at sap, which horribly failed, because . But at least it's waffy and sort of sappy, so... yey? I love that particular line of Sasuke's as well. For obvious reasons. ;P I simply couldn't resist.
3rd-Jan-2003 01:47 pm (UTC)
(LOL!) Isn't the lack of sap a good thing? And Naruto's just screaming for comments like that XD Sasuke's just the person to dole it out ^_^ What a pair!
26th-Dec-2002 04:56 am (UTC)
even though i know zilch about naruto except that he's, er, the *blond* guy, i liked this fic--it's cute and kind of WAFFy :Þ
26th-Dec-2002 05:30 am (UTC)
You must read Naruto. And I'm not just saying that for all the SasuNaru goodness either. It's really a very fun read. *pimp*pimp* And thank you! ^^
27th-Dec-2002 07:17 am (UTC)
Anonymous
AHhhh! That fic was so cute! ^_^ You have to write more! Have you written more? More fics, more...more, just..more!
^_^
MK
27th-Dec-2002 01:26 pm (UTC) - Definite Sweetness!
Anonymous
Hi! This is Kaminiko from the Naru-yaoi list, and I'm commenting on this fic because well, it rocked big time! It was funny and sweet, without being overly sappy. I love it when those two bicker, its just the height of romantic cuteness. I hope you get to finish your other fic, because I'd love to read it. Welcome to the list btw!


--Kaminiko (http://kaminiko.lunap.com/ (http://kaminiko.lunap.com/))
2nd-Jan-2003 08:57 am (UTC)
Is so not sap. At least to me it isn't. Well, sap or not, it's a wonderful fic (<3) and I thank you for writing it.

Oh, and a minor spelling mistake; supposed to be Uzumaki instead of Uzumuki.
3rd-Jan-2003 02:04 am (UTC)
And thank you for commenting. ^^ I realize it isn't exactly sap, but SasuNaru is so hard to write sap for that it's probably the closest thing to sap that I can write without making them OOC.

Thanks. Will remedy that immediately.
13th-Nov-2005 03:15 am (UTC)
Just found this, and I must say--it's a really pretty little story. Watching the two interact was really nice, and the way Naruto was pounding on the door and the threats were hilarious. *grins*

I love the descriptions in the last half--after they get back inside. THere's something both very male-friends and peaceful about it. Well done. :D

I run a Naruto archive, and was wondering if I might archive this. It's at Hidde Village

Thanks!

JB
16th-Nov-2005 03:59 am (UTC)
Thank you very much for taking the time to comment, I'm glad to know you enjoyed it. ^^ Unfortunately, I do not allow any of my works to be archived anywhere save for where I have control over whether I can edit them at any given time or take them down as I see fit.

I'm sorry, although if you still wish to, I do not mind having it linked to my own site. I just like having control over where my writing is. I have fics I wrote 7 years ago still lingering in old archive sites that make me cringe. ^^;;
16th-Nov-2005 10:21 pm (UTC)
I wouldn't mind just linking to the fic on your site; there's actaully a few authors who've done that, citing the same reasons. *grins* Personally, once I'm done witha fic I never want to see it again... ;) (Of course, this means I don't have to HTML it, which is so good. *Grins*)

If that's all right with you, what's your site URL? (I may be blind, but I'm not seeing it here...)

JB
12th-Dec-2005 03:22 am (UTC)
I actually no longer have a fic site as I rarely bother to update it, so you would be outlinking to this LJ post instead. ^^ I also have it up on FF.net, if you'd rather outlink to that?
13th-Dec-2005 03:55 pm (UTC)
Nah, I just linked it here (though I did provide a linkto your ff.net account, too). Actually, it appears I did it a bit ago, anticipating the 'link to my LJ' response. *laughs* I'd totally forgotten... ;)

Anyway, it's up! :)

J
15th-Dec-2005 06:14 pm (UTC)
Thank you for the heads up. BTW, just as a minor correction, I use the name Arcina, mithas is purely the LJ username. ^^
31st-Dec-2005 04:42 am (UTC)
Whoops! Sorry! I can't change it from this comp, but next time I'm on (hopefully soon. Ish.) I'll fix that. :)

J
9th-Jan-2007 02:02 am (UTC) - None
Anonymous
Okay then it was good. oh by the way this does not sound like sasuke even if this is christmas. okay, but this does sound like naruto. expect for that its really good keep writing. this is constructive criticism.
13th-Feb-2007 11:59 pm (UTC) - Yay!
Anonymous
It's nice to read a fanfic that doesn't go anywhere disturbing. Fluff is a nice change. And BTW you have an incredibly talent. Characters were spot-on. Keep writing! Looking forward to anything i might stumble across that was written by you.
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